NTSC, dispossessed flapper.

distortion, bloody distortion.

14 February 2008 · Leave a Comment

sad, bouncy songs. insanity. battleaxes. zsa zsa gabor. when liquor is what’s for breakfast, lunch and dinner. shirley simms singing like she’s just had twenty quaaludes and was dragged to the studio by her hair (at gunpoint). a lot of distortion.
yes, reader love, the magnetic fields have a new album. and it’s good. and it’s the first thing to surface from stephin merritt’s main (and best) project in four years.

disclaimer: i still wish stephin would kidnap susan amway, persuade her growing cranberries isn’t the best she can do and make her sing his beautiful songs again, but all in all and nevertheless, distortion deserved a small celebratory photoshoot.

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→ Leave a CommentCategories: boom la la la. · pre-present.

doom and gloom and dirges.

10 February 2008 · Leave a Comment

it’s easy to see why some like their opiates served up in church (naive), others get obsessed with money and a ‘career’ (loathsome), and others still turn to family life (ill-advised). i myself fancy real opiates, but anyway…

our collective insignificance is just so overwhelming. there is nothing to be gained by going down this road, i know, and i should turn back at once, i know that too; but what i don’t know is what i’m still doing here when i’m not even… not even moderately amused or pleased by it all.

once upon a time, in a long-gone land far from the western european seaboard, anyone who wanted to ponder about the meaning of life was cordially invited to perch him-/herself on top of a handsome, tall pillar for the remainder of his/her existence, and start pondering away. in return, the locals would assure a steady stream of cakes and tea (or rather olives and retsina wine, this is the byzantine empire we’re talking about).

now this sounds alluring. why should one still get out of bed each morning, try to dress agreeably, try to be friendly to a rather large collection of asinine, inane strangers over the course of that very day, try not to be too tired after a day at the university and try to spend the evening in a nice enough way? why? i don’t see why, really. is there really anything gained by going down this socially condoned road? anything lasting?

i would rather not spend my energy pointlessly and instead devote my life to… em. building a handsome, old-fashioned, doric column? check! reading the collected works of rosamond lehmann and her literary school of 1920s spinsters on top of the pillar i wrought with my own hands? check! gazing down contemptuously on the very villagers who provide me with frangipane cakes and earl grey tea? check!

the road to insanity is steep and slippery, and i seem to have a bobsled. i can’t even seem to describe this dreaded feeling of insignificance that makes me want to pursue a, hopefully fruitful, career in the noble building trade. ta for now, dear reader. i’m going to pretend it’s 1920. laudanum is still sold over the counter and the twenty-first century was just a hysterical nightmare i once had (tres david mitchell, that).
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→ Leave a CommentCategories: deep thoughts.

all things bright and beautiful.

1 February 2008 · 2 Comments

exams finished and all. i think they were a complete disaster, but then again, the last time i thought i did even remotely well at anything was probably in 1997.

so, your hero is feeling the heat of his seemingly perpetual depression again. i am waiting for a force majeure to come crashing in; a nuclear holocaust would be particularly welcome.

it’s a pity there aren’t any square-jawed soviets sitting in front of dangerous-looking red buttons and those odd, flimsy computers the communist bloc had around anymore. right now life would seem somewhat more tolerable if there was a fair possibility of it being abruptly ended by something out of a glum, run-down siberian silo.

oh well. foucault said it, and said it well: il y a des moments dans la vie où la question de savoir si on peut penser autrement qu’on ne pense et percevoir autrement qu’on ne voit est indispensable pour continuer à regarder ou à réfléchir… and this is definitely one of those. (la question est bien celle-ci: si bien je pouvais penser autrement que je ne pense, cher michel, et ce soit honteux qu’on aura jamais une quelconque réponse, ou bien qu’elle me parviendrait trop tard de toute facon.)

a portrait of a web 2.0 child wrapped up in jackets:

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i shall leave you, for now, with these sybilline words. hopefully they mean more to you than they do to me (that is, not one iota). i might quite possibly need… some sleep and a bit less doom and gloom.

→ 2 CommentsCategories: deep thoughts. · pre-present.

nicola barker fanboy.

31 January 2008 · Leave a Comment

i am, as usual, monstruously lazy. one day my sofa and i will somehow… fuse… into one another, i’m sure. well, i wouldn’t mind being a stuffed, brown, velvety (and moaning) chippendale knockoff. ah, la monstruosite! which reminds me that i wanted to tell you about nicola barker’s latest novel, darkmans.

booker prize nomination, some buzz, yati yata, best female english author since zadie smith, more buzz, yati yata. however, this novel is actually really good. it’s about a haunting instilled upon the quiet kentish boom-town (yeah, as if) of ashford, and more precisely its inhabitants isidore (a very confused german), his wife elen (a very confused chiropodist), and their son fleet (an evil toddler, possessed by the evil forces, or maybe the only normal person around).

daniel beede, a family friend and hypochondriac who stopped living around 1971 (inside joke: he is mr. alfred!) steps in to, well, save ashford and the universe (ashford is the universe, ha), and so far only seems to make matters infinitely worse. his dusty orange duraplast phone, ca. 1975, seems to be the evil force’s major.. weapon…

hm hm, looks like i’ll be having fun for another 700 pages (838 total)! darkmans finds the right balance between fun, horror and realism. so far it all seems terribly realistic: maybe they’re just really insane. aah, i should get on with my korean! ta ra, dear reader.

→ Leave a CommentCategories: pre-present.

2007 in music.

28 January 2008 · 7 Comments

it’s time for the obligatory top ten! there was a lot to choose from this year, but i’ve picked the records that somehow really stood out.

10. Stars of the Lid – … And Their Refinement of the Decline

i have a soft spot for electronic classical music, or contemporary classical music, or whatever you want to call it. the stars of the lid are probably the best band working in this minimalistic, chilly genre right now, and it had been six years since the tired sounds of stars of the lid… but their breathless, airy compositions with exactly the right drones at the right time still sound blissful and pregnant with meaning, and that’s all this blogger asked for. more organic than their previous work though – more lamonte young than delia derbyshire. which isn’t at all a bad thing either.

 

 

09. Studio – Yearbook One

studio are a swedish duo. their music is an unlikely combination of krautrock, balearic trance circa 1988 and pet shop boys-ish synthpop. that might sound a bit repelling and too scene for its own good (like, the kind of music scene people wearing couture that looks like thriftstore gear listen to in lounge bars or wherever hipsters go to die), but yearbook one is actually really good. i challenge you to listen to ‘radio edit’ or ‘no comply’ without feeling the desire for a royal serving of ecstasy.

 

 

08. M.I.A. – Kala

some people say music shouldn’t be political. m.i.a., everybody’s favourite tamil tiger, would probably bang their heads against a wall. hiphop infused with the modern lovers, new order, the clash and with aboriginal children on the mic is fine with me, and even if you would want to block the political messages (which i happen to agree with) out, there’d be a hell of a listenable dance record left. and it’s good to know an AK-47 is $20 in most of africa these days, not to mention the fact that she’s out for your money, and she’ll shoot you for it (i’d shoot you if you were a capitalist, stock exchange-crawling parasite and take your money, too, hypothetically speaking).

 

07. Electrelane – No Shouts, No Calls

every once in a while some major label pundit crawls out from under his rock and screams the album format is dead. if they just listened to no shouts, no calls, they’d know this is definitely not the case. electrelane’s specialty is the kind of stereolabby kraut-pop one gets obsessed with before he knows it even happened. this is probably the most cohesive album of the year: 11 concise, pretty songs that break your heart and spin your world around.

 

 

06. Deerhoof – Friend Opportunity

i got into deerhoof with friend opportunity, way back when in 2005 (haha). if that album was a noiserock assault on the senses, friend opportunity is its crazy cousin who lives in a nepali ashram and claims she’s in contact with the cosmic entities after she’s sniffed a gallon’s worth of diesel fumes. on this little objet d’art, deerhoof switch from noisy guitars to menacing tropicalia to japanese synthpop every two minutes or so. ready your ritalin and off we stride!

 

 

 

05. LCD Soundsystem – Sound of Silver

yeah well, if you haven’t heard this album chances are you’ve been in a particularly nasty coma for the better part of 2007. to sum it up shortly, james murphy expands on his eponymous debut’s chunky dance-rock, coming off like this generation’s eno or kraftwerk in the process, and well, it’s a really good album. that port-a-cath does look nasty, dear, you should go download ’someone great’ and rest for a little while, maybe.

 

 

 

04. Caribou – Andorra

dan snaith, aka caribou, has spent most of his career synthesizing sixties psychedelia, latter-day folktronica and 70s drugscapes. on andorra, his fourth album, he somehow permutates sixties sunshine pop, creating a little universe of songs about girls with grannies’ names, sometimes steve reich-ian, sometimes droning, sometimes jarring, at times very ornate and chocked up with strings – andorra is like a bonbon box full of yummy chocolate, there simply isn’t room for even one more heavenly sighed word, drone, or found sound, and it’s just so… satisfying to listen to.

 

 

03. of Montreal – Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer?

kevin barnes, of montreal’s only real member, had hit a bad patch when recording this little gem. his wife had ran off, leaving him snowed in in norway, in the grip of a bad chemical depression, which in turn spawned hissing fauna. i’ve rarely heard a more accurate expression of serious depression – yes, it sounds glammy, but isn’t glamour the saddest things at times? and yes, it’s bouncy, but if you were on ten tabs of lithium a day, you’d be hopping around like a kangaroo too, trust me. hissing fauna is both catchy and sad, hopeful and desperate. the irony of it all is that this record seems to have been of montreal’s big commercial break – but then kevin and nina are back together and both way happier than they were.

 

02. Panda Bear – Person Pitch

disclaimer: i really loathe animal collective and wouldn’t call it music (all i have to say about animal collective is: fuck off, americans, get a job). i consequently didn’t think panda bear’s solo stuff would be any good, but it is. person pitch sounds like a protools collage of the tribal chants of a long-lost country, the best in acoustic developments this century, and delicious warbly organ drones. it’s a thing of beauty, and i’m addicted to it… but animal collective are still wankers.

 

 

 

01. The Fiery Furnaces – Widow City

the fiery furnaces have always been a tricky band, to say the least. they seem to be stuck in a cyclical movement between awesomeness (blueberry boat!) and complete suckiness (their opus about, and sung by, their late grandmother olga saranthos. it has to be heard to be believed). widow city finds them back in greatness-mode: it’s a 70s-inspired classic rock story about being carried off to decorate bordellos, dancing naked for the sultan of medina sidonia, the hieroglyph for french canal boat, feeling really lonely, inventing ‘the emergency cigarette behind glass’, cairo, demonic husbands with mistresses, the duplexes of the dead, a murderous grand jury, and doormats with nautical prints. oh yeah, the music is quite brilliant too – menacing, sexy math rock grooves, contradictory as that might seem. this is an album that makes me feel like somebody, something not many albums could possibly pull off.

merci, les friedberger.

Not quite there, but really pretty close, really:

a couple of records that are not on this list but almost, almost were: blonde redhead’s 23scout niblett’s this fool can die now, the field’s from here we go sublime, matthew dear’s asa breed and chromatics’ night drive (iv).

The Worst of 2007, at least the worst of the so-called good:

animal collective (!!!!!), beirut (!!!!!), justice (!!!!!!), architecture in helsinki, a place to bury strangers, midnight juggernauts, and the worst record i’ve heard for as long as i can remember: white williams. it’s so bad it gets… well, it doesn’t get good, but it makes you want to introduce mr. ‘white williams’ to the dutch euthanasia procedure. worse than yoko ono, worse than bob dylan when he went christian, worse than animal collective, even.

→ 7 CommentsCategories: boom la la la. · in retrospect. · records.

stuck in my deep sea diving suit.

26 January 2008 · 1 Comment

i hate-hate exams and studying. in a perfect world i’d just sit in my sofa, smoke and listen to music all day. i guess i’ll just go on the dole when i graduate and do just that, then (oh, and wear all my clothes once, which typically takes three to four days).

i love-love bumming around and listening to the magnetic fields, though. if it were a profession, i’d have it put on my passport. stephin knows me better than anyone else, and there’s always another magnetic fields song to identify with and get you in a droning, looped downward spiral of schmalzy despair.

right now i feel like the protagonist of the wayward bus’ ’suddenly there is a tidal wave’.

the boys talk like they own the world
the women keep their stupid diaries
but suddenly there is a tidal wave
and everything is swept out to sea

i wish there’d be a tidal wave sweeping EITHER me OR the sinology dept. staff out to sea, preferably to the south sandwich islands (for their name fascinates me). oh well. more korean. more coffee and cigarettes. more smiths songs on repeat. while this might all sound just a tiny bit depressed, i’m actually feeling… complacent. (if it turns out i’ve failed all subjects, i’ll run around in a hysterical frenzy though.)

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i wish i lived in disneyland.

→ 1 CommentCategories: boom la la la. · pre-present.

flunketyflunk, starring sc.

23 January 2008 · 3 Comments

AAH! i think i’ve just been through the first bad exam of my life. while i was sitting with a fan in my face and sipping shandies all day, thinking chinese philosophy was not worth any more effort than strictly necessary, carine ‘polartec’, phd, apparently devised a cunning plan to rob me of:

  1. my intellectual dignity
  2. any marks above 10/20
  3. my sophisticated theory of everything (she forgot it was there, forgot it was even there).

well okay, so maybe it wasn’t catastrophically bad, but it sure wasn’t up to my usual standards. the problem with carine is that she knows me too well and never lets me wrap her up in long and overly verbose sentences, like this one, for instance. she kept on moaning unholy things like ‘KEEP IT SHORT!’ ‘SHORTUUUUH!’, and i felt an encroaching darkness when she triumphantly said ‘no, i don’t think mencius said confucius was like the mythical kings yao and shun after the flood, really! i think that was NOT THE CASE!’.

people who like to come to the point quickly piss me off. so at one point i went like:
“SO DOES THAT MEAN IT’S BAD? ARE YOU SUGGESTING IT’S POORLY MADE? UNIMAGINATIVE?” (it was a take-home exam, mind you.)
“i didn’t say that at all.”
“I SHOULD HOPE SO.”

WOE,  intellectual pride, WOE, you have been defeated by a fortysomething fleece-wearing woman. WOE IS ME.

apart from that, i’m having a great time listening to kim hiorthoy’s beautiful my last day. i’m going to see him in Feb and we shall DANCE, DANCE to his cut-up acoustic electro (and yes, that exists). norwegians do it better, dear reader, and i’m in a slightly hysterical mood, so i am going to get me a bottle of good wine from the cellar.

→ 3 CommentsCategories: boom la la la. · pre-present.

don’t worry simon, this darkness is just a suggestion.

14 January 2008 · 1 Comment

korean is a disaster! that’s how i always knew this story would end (i.e. in tears and a senseless studying frenzy). maybe i could join these happy, though slightly curvy, ladies and dance, magically forgetting myself and acquiring a basic korean vocabulary (YES, i know 칠판 is a blackboard and 미용사 is a hairdresser, but i won’t know anymore in twenty minutes).

despair, oh despair, and wooh, pretty dancing women.

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when this is all over, i think i’m going to go on a sherry diet, gain 400 lbs and dance around naked. 감사합니다, 한국말를!저는 한어공부해요! insert more korean whining here. 천만 예요!

→ 1 CommentCategories: pre-present.